I poured over these in private (well, as private as a women's center can be!), and I got so turned on, I knew there was something very amiss with our rhetoric! Fortunately, I'm a girl who goes with her instincts, and these two experiences taught me to question the notion that sexually-explicit materials were bad for me.

Little did my parents know, but they were part of a revolution happening in the adult entertainment market. Thanks to cable TV and the invention of the VCR, millions of people discovered the pleasures of at-home viewing, and it wasn't just "Terms of Endearment" they were cueing up after the kids went to bed. Today, an estimated 30% of all video rentals are X-rated tapes, and the adult video industry is a multi-billion dollar business. And women and couples are a rapidly growing part of that market.

People watch erotic videos for the same reasons they read or view other sexually oriented material—to get aroused, to get new ideas or collect fantasy material, to learn about sexual techniques or behaviors, to get more comfortable with sex. Many couples watch X-rated movies together as a means of igniting sexual desire or sharing with a partner the types of activities they find enjoyable. And lots of people watch them alone because, as they say in that old commercial, "it's the next best thing to being there!"

It can take awhile to let go of some of the guilt or anxiety we harbor with respect to this material. Particularly for women, who've been taught that porn exploits other women and is morally corrupt, it can take a major attitude adjustment to just let go and experience the pleasure for pleasure’s sake.

Tips for Getting the Most out of Your Porn Experience

Watch one alone first.
View the video by yourself to freely and honestly explore your range of reactions to the erotic material. You won’t be inhibited by someone else’s presence, so you can focus all your attention on what is or isn’t turning you on. You may discover that an activity you were convinced was repulsive holds a particularly explosive charge. Sometimes you just have to feel it to believe it!

Shut off the noise inside your head, and just watch.
If you’ve resisted watching erotic videos because you think you aren’t supposed to like that stuff, give it a try. You may be surprised by how you respond. If you don’t think women are supposed to enjoy porn, ask yourself why. Don’t women respond to sexual entertainment or visual imagery? I sure do.

Check out some of the porn made by women.
If you feel porn exploits women, consider that a growing number of porn is made by and for women, and that plenty of actresses love their jobs. Here are a few notables;

Eyes of Desire by Candida Royalle.
Candida is a former porn star and a well-respected feminist director, with a large number of titles to her credit. This is one of the most popular.

Hard Love and How to Fuck in High Heels.
This video from a real-life dyke couple won an Adult Video News Award last year. It's funny, urban and features lots of real lesbian

Nina Hartley's Guide to Oral Sex.
Porn star Nina Hartley launched her own line of sex ed tapes which are simultaneously informative and arousing. She uses her pals in the industry to demonstrate the techniques and they all look like they enjoy their work!

Slide By Me.
Good Vibrations, my alma mater got its feet wet in the adult film business with this wonderful freshman effort featuring an outdoor sex romp with a diverse cast and more sex toys than you can possibly imagine!

Use the fast forward button

Don’t hesitate to use the fast forward when watching porn if you get a bit bored. You’re probably not missing much dialogue and you might find that the hotter scene awaits you further along.

If you’re watching porn with a partner, don’t take it seriously
If you’re in a relationship where your partner doesn’t exactly share your penchant for porn (and this applies to books and magazines as well), stress that you're not watching porn as a way of unfavorably comparing your partner to the actors and actresses on screen, you're doing it to enhance the arousal you can share it with your partner. This might help alleviate his or her anxieties in order to just enjoy the experience.

Save some for later

I’ve found that some of my hottest fantasy material originally came from porn. If a certain scene or act really turns you on, stash it in your memory bank and call upon it later when you need a little libido pick me up.

How to Choose Videos?

If you are game for venturing into the adult section of your local video store, you may be instantly overwhelmed by the rows of seemingly identical boxes. If you’re a sex video novice, trying to choose one can be a complete crap shoot. Here are some tips:

• Think about what might appeal to you in a porn movie. Are you looking for certain kinds of sexual activities, certain couplings, certain famous porn stars, particular directors or an interesting plot? If you’re clear about your personal criteria, you’ll at least have something to look for
  
  
• Read the box. While the information on the box is not always helpful or accurate, it may mention or allude to something you’re interested in
  
  
• Read reviews. Just like mainstream mvies, adult movies are reviewed, and reviews can provide some hints about the sexual content, the plot or the actors involved. Look for these in magazines like Adult Video News and Screw, although keep in mind that these are trade magazines designed to sell videos, so don’t expect critical analyses. For more thoughtful reviews, sex 'zines and on-line magazines can be a great resource, as can almanacs like the Ultimate Guide to Adult Videos.
  
  
• Look for award winners. Publications such as Adult Video News sponsor annual awards ceremonies, and awards are usually noted on box copy. This can work, but bear in mind the disagreements you’ve had with the Academy Award judges in the past.
  
  
• Ask friends for recommendations. Obviously not everyone is comfortable quizzing friends about their tastes in porn, but personal recommendations can be invaluable in separating the wheat from the chaff. Surfing computer bulletin board services, usenet news groups and web sites is an excellent way to learn about other people’s porn preferences while maintaining your anonymity.
  
  
• Ask the store clerk. This isn’t always easy either, but if you can muster up the courage, you may tap into a valuable resource.
  
  
• Look for a rating system. Some retailers and many web sites use rating systems to help viewers narrow down titles of interest to them.

Ok, now it’s time to pop in a DVD or video and turn yourself on!